Winter 2005—2006

I'll try not to bore you to tears.
Let's kill the mood even more, shall we?
Lighten up, everybody. It's only once a week.
Is your microwave playing World of Warcraft?
Believe it or not, I'm not a hard—ass.
Because we have a few jackasses in the class, you're all off the hook today.
You were born in a pivotal year of computer history. Cool.
Port A is intriguing.
I asked you to do a skills assessment not just 'cause it's required, jackass.
I worked up a hokey car example.
That's alotta shit. Pardon my French.
It's so sad that you guys haven't used Amiga.
This book sucks.
I'm going to attempt to draw a cylinder—and don't you laugh at me.
Did we talk about that in here? I threw an eraser across the room.
That word is so important and so poorly spelled by students I will write it up here.
Wow, I cannot write today. Not enough Diet Coke.
[5.0 * 10²² atoms/cm³] is a fairly easy number to remember.
To get information on top, you would "man" on "top". That just sounded really bad.
To say that is an understatement is in itself is an understatement.
Two things happen when you fork a child.
I'm assuming you've memorized the periodic table.
I have a number of ways of killing things.
Exactly wrong.
You are the guineapig class.
The child is now a zombie. That's cool.
The answer sheet was wrong. I don't know what I was smoking when I did that one.
When you hit 40, all your brain cells start to die.
I would have gotten here sooner, but I was sitting on the hallway floor and it takes an old man awhile to get up…If you're laughing at what I think you are, that too.
I can't remember. I'm not a compiler.
Probabilistically.
There were a group of students almost asleep [in my EE201 class], so I faked a heart—attack at the blackboard.
I love flying as you can tell, my arms are really tired.
We were pow—wowing talking about you.
I'm sorry that that word down there is so poorly spelled.
Did I say, "Probably have a probability"?
Dynamical.
When you graduate from here, you can probably find anyone to pay you 10³dollars/month. Not even basketball players make 10⁷/month.
Most people are awake here.
Let's not stick the 'e' in there. Foreward Wisconsin.
How many old ladies have you guys helped across the street this winter? Electrons are the same thing.
Different wavelengths put in here suck.
One of the ways people fixed that was the don't.
ME's…have problems with child molesting.
Any other questions I know the answer to?
Staple it before I kill you.
I would feel much more comfortable with all of you packing heat.
One of my little bastard freshman students left a pointy staple sticking out of the back of the page.
All of you are—well most of you are—clever, sharp individuals.
This is officially an abuse of my position's power.
"BS" is good enough. Appropriate for the group.
I need to drink copious amounts of beer in order to get through these papers.
If I started talking about sex right now, it would get kinda weird.
Are you all bored? How about we all go outside and make snowmen? You don't have to be here. How many of you are 21? Aw, I had a great idea for a second.
You should see me with the freshman—I can kick their asses.
I've had experience in the porn industry.