Fuck Expensive Clothing

Hollister, American Eagle, Abercrombie and Fitch... WHY?!?!? The other day, I purchased 5 perfectly good T-shirts from my local Goodwill store. The total cost? 4 fucking dollars. What the hell makes certain shirts / pants from these popular markets SO GODDAMNED EXPENSIVE?! Is it the subtle sexual inuendo that is integrated into most T-shirts from these soulless companies, concocted in an air-conditioned boardroom filled with 50-year-old suits who listen to Strauss all day? Is it the vivid colors that draw attention to these even shallower buyers; something to say, "Hey, look at me! I paid 20 fucking dollars for this shirt!" I can only guess. Since when did a piece of cloth with something printed on it cost so much, anyways? So far, all of my shirts that I have purchased from Goodwill have fulfilled clothing's main purpose: to cover up one's nakedness. Every day that I put one of my 70¢ Goodwill "Colored Tag Sale" shirts on, it successfully accomplishes its purpose of covering up my scrawny, white torso. What would be different if it were some shirt I payed $20 for? Well, every day that I put on one of my $20 "Some Popular TV Personality Guy Wore This Same Shirt Design Special" shirt, I feel like I can successfully fit in with the rest of my shallow friends, whom have also purchased similar shirts with similar designs. My life is complete. My life is complete minus $20 and a small piece of my soul.